Jacqui Leclerc

Things we have learned we shouldn’t do when driving at 38 foot long, 12 foot high motor home…

Listening to our GPS unit when trying to shave off a few miles–just stick to the Interstates and it’ll all be good. Do not, for any reason, attempt to take a path that was designed for goats and nothing bigger. (slight exageration, but you get the point). We experienced this in Utah, thinking we could take a jog from one Interstate to another. The map said it was a secondary highway. The GPS said we were good to go. We knew it was bad news from the get go, for as soon as we merged onto this ‘highway’ (and I’m being generous here), it began to climb. Soon we saw a sign posted saying that semi’s were strongly recommended to turn around (and turn about lots were even provided). But we, thinking that this recommendation couldn’t possibly be for us as well, sailed on past the turn out.  Once we got past there, we had some second thots. Signs were now posted saying there were 8% grades. And switchbacks…but it was too late now, there wasn’t anywhere we could turn around. So Darryn bravely carried on, the Cummins motor puffing as it pushed us up the hills, Allison transmission lurching as it struggled to gear down, jake brake growling to slow us down as we careened down the mountain. (Well, the careening started once we reached the summit of 9900 feet. Up until then, it was just the motor puffing). Some of those corners I was sure that the hind end of the bus wasn’t coming along with us thinking it might get hung up on a curve… You gotta love the signs saying to watch for falling rocks. When is a good time to watch for them? As they are falling off the side of the cliff, or when they are blocking your path and you have no choice but to ride over them? Really now, be more specific! All in all, it was an eventful 38 miles and I talked a lot to Jesus.

Another thing to watch out for when driving a motor home is parking lots, esspecially the entances (Lowes seems to be the most threatening thus far). Just because you have zipped about in parking lots with your Volkswagen, you should never believe that your Gulf Stream is as nimble as your Golf. There are special entrances/exits for tractor/trailer units, and you should use them too, instead of thinking you can peel off of the highway and zip into the car entrance. Absolutely NO zipping!

And here is a special note to drivers who have never driven/ridden in a vehicle that is larger than a compact car. We don’t stop quickly. This incident happened in the Grand Canyon (well, it didn’t go so far that we actually went INTO the canyon, but it was a learning curve, nonetheless).  Cruisin’ along nicely at about 40mph, along the road winding thru the Grand Canyon National Park. Ahead of us was a Cavalier and another car of similar proportions. Ok, so we’re doing 40 ok? So this means, when you espie a scenic pullout, you should signal your intentions (the little orange lights that blink). Not just hit the brakes at the last minute and then slowly ease into the parking area. I don’t think the two cars ahead of us even saw us bearing down upon them, but they quite possibly had heart attacks when at the last minute, (as we were literally 2 inches away from having them encased in our front end), Darryn laid on the air horn and blasted them good. It was amazing that we were able to almost stop from 40mph. Man, that was a rush, for everyone involved I am sure.  I will always remember to respect big rigs from now on!!!

I have learned other things as well, but I think I will save them for another day. I wouldn’t want to overwhelm anyone who is reading this, nor do I wish to over tax my brain writing this.

And so begins our journey, deep into the United States. We left Alberta behind two days ago, loaded up the old diesel pusher and fought our way through scattered snow storms, ferocious head winds and mini-vans.

We got on the tail end of the old-timers brigade, frantically driving south. Every motor home we see is from Alberta, the average age of the drivers being at leat 73. Imagine their surprise when we roll on by them, as they peer out their windows at us, hunched over the steering wheel, and see us young punks waving like morons at them.

We have discovered that there are oldtimers (who have always wanted a motor home, but don’t because they have not retired yet), who seem to stalk us. Darryn got attacked by a 70 (at least) year old the other day, who would, been given the chance, cheerfully left his job at the Flying J, and come along with us. I had to peel this old guy off of D, cuz else we woulda never gotten back on the road, he was so full of questions. Good times.

We are the only ones so far who aren’t towing a vehicle. Maybe note to self…don’t RV w/o secondary set of wheels…so far it’s been fine b/c D has a knack for pulling into small parking lots, and for the most part, when we are stopping, it’s for fuel or Walmart.  I don’t think it will be too much fun if we have to go off the beaten path. So hence, we are planning this trip around truck stops and Walmarts.

Yesterday we experienced the RV life at its best–filling up with diesel, propane, and water, and dumping our tanks. So imagine this–72 Gallons diesel-Check (don’t forget the Auxillary. tank), 100 Gallons of water-Check, 24 Gallons of propane- Check, Empty the sewage tanks-Eww! 

We figured out our mileage; the harsh conditions played a huge part, I’m sure (extreme wind and mountainous terrain).  We got 6.8mpg (I was a little sad about that, so I figured it out in Canadian mpg, but when you’re dealing with #’s that low, it only gave us another mpg) *sigh* So we are hoping for some better mileage, once we get to some flat roads, and perhaps no wind. At least 10mpg…

Ahh, the snow is gently falling. Big fluffy flakes. The temperature is in the minus regions.  The roads are promising to be interesting, come morning. Oh, the joys of living in Alberta. I have lived here my whole life, and yet, I still can’t seem to drum up any enthusiasm for snow, cold, ice, horrendous roads and people who drive like wing nuts.  A lot of people here actually look forward to winter. Think of all the fun you can have, doing winter sports, like sledding, and skidooing, and hockey. Snowmen, snow angels and snowballs. What people who don’t live here never hear about is this: Imagine gearing up, just to step outside. I actually have a winter coat that is rated to keep me warm when it’s 40 degrees below zero, doing 60mph on a snowmobile. My boots come near my knees, and are rated for -40degrees. Being that I am cold all the time, I wear the coat as soon as it hits freezing, the boots come out at around -5 degrees C.

There are days when it’s so cold that the battery freezes in the car. (Being smart Albertans that we are, we take a hair dryer, plug it in and stick it under the hood on full blast for a few hours to thaw things out). Hey, ya gotta do what ya gotta do. We also have to plug in our cars when the temps start to plummet, just so’s they’ll start.  And then there’s the days when there is so much snow, that either you stay home, or start to shovel. (We have a snow blower which is a nice alternative to shoveling, although if the wind is blowing, you usually get a nice face full of snow). Blech.

So all I’m sayin’ is this; winter seems to have hit here, and global warming hasn’t made its way to this area of the globe yet.